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The demon drink - Worried about Dad's drinking

Billy’s father Henry had a life-long drinking problem. Periodically, he would go on a binge. Sometimes these would be prompted by the purchase or sale of a horse which Henry always thought warranted a celebration. Unfortunately these binges would often last for several days leaving Henry sick, broke and behind in his work. Henry’s drinking had a serious impact on the family. His wife, Eliza, found her husband’s drinking very distressing. The family depended on Henry’s uncertain income from his cartage work, chimney sweeping and other odd jobs. The loss of just a few days income, compounded by the cost of the drink itself, would push the household to the edge of ruin.

As oldest son, Billy felt a heavy responsibility to support the family in whatever way he could. As a child he had worked several hours a day to supplement the family income. Once he had completed his apprenticeship he continued to subsidise the family from his modest income whether he was in Horsham or working on a building site in London. But when Henry’s drinking was particularly bad, it put the “family business” at serious risk. On a number of occasions, Billy’s mother would summon him home to keep the cartage business going and to try and get his father back on the rails.
 
Henry’s drinking, and the precarious state of the family finances, were to limit Billy’s options for the next twenty years. Instead of staying in London to take advantage of the greater opportunities in the building trade, Billy stayed in and around Horsham where he could keep an eye on his Father’s business. More seriously, he felt obliged to continue to support his family financially right through until his Father’s death in 1914. Only then, in his early forties, when all his brothers and sisters were out in work, did Billy feel free to seek a wife.
 
Sunday 14th April 1894
Father came home very much the worse for drink. Fairly disgusted and made up my mind to try Abstinence.
 
Thursday 18th October 1894
[Just started a new job in Dorking] After tea had a stroll, then went to the Temperance Mission meeting in Junction Road Hall. Fairly good speech by W. Noble. Bright singing.
Friday 19th October 1894
Temperance Mission in the evening. Was persuaded by what the speaker (Mr Skinner) said to sign the Pledge. Trust I may keep it. Just over five months ago I made up my mind to try Abstinence.

 
An Earnest Plea for the Reign of Temperance and Peace etc“An Earnest Plea for the Reign of Temperance and Peace etc” presented to Billy’s maternal grandfather William Pumphrey, Late Sergt. 77th Regiment, by the Executive Committee, Royal Exhibition, 1851 and re-gifted to young Billy in 1884.
 

But just two days later…
 
Sunday 21st October 1894 [back in Horsham]
Arthur and Bernard called for me about 10. Had a walk, then to Chapel. Seems a long while since I went last. In the afternoon Bern got off from Sunday School so we arranged to have a walk round Parthings but rain upset that again so, as we were close, Arthur proposed we sample the wine etc. at Frank Charman’s. Sampled two brands and the Electric Battery[1] and all came home to tea.
 
Saturday 31st August 1895 (Weekend visit home)
Things don’t seem to be very comfortable at home again. Dad gets so awfully short-tempered and with that and other worries, poor Mum has enough to put up with I’m sure. All at home now and 2 from Tunbridge Wells.[2]
Sunday 1st September 1895
Wish I could alter things at home.
 
Saturday 21st March 1896
Caught 1.10 train[3] for home via Clapham Junction. Arrive 3 p.m. and found all A1. Dad fairly busy and fairly well considering he was very poorly a few days ago. His own fault though. Mother tells me he promised to put a stop to such affairs. Hope he may keep the promise but I cannot help doubting it. Poor old Dad! Wish he would keep straight if only for Mother’s sake.
 
Tuesday 7th April 1896 (day after a Bank Holiday)
Everyone on the job suffering more or less from the effects of Monday, or rather in most cases from “Booze”. Strange but true that such a state of things should occur. If a man is not kept at work from one year’s end to another, he seems bound to drown his sorrows in flowing bowl while all kinds of amusements are within the reach of all especially in this quarter.

 
Ye Olde King's Head HotelYe Olde King's Head Hotel, the Carfax, Horsham, reproduced courtesy of West Sussex Past Pictures, Ref: PP/WSL/WA000365, Rep: West Sussex County Council Library Service. Image credit.

 
Saturday 23rd May 1896
Got away from Job (Stud House, Hampton Court Palace) early, caught trains alright and arrived at home by 1 o’clock. Found Mother only fairly well and Dad a trifle loose[4]. Harry[5] at home, not altered a bit. Very much surprised and vexed to find he had appeared as defendant in a County Court affair over a bicycle, and more surprised to know Dad not only allowed the affair to go on but prompted Harry in it, and now tells him not to pay it – made me rather wild.
 
Sunday 24th May 1896
Dad much better today, consequently Mother ditto.
 
Friday 17th July 1896
Met Mother at Kingston Station this evening. She is fairly well but doesn’t report very favourably of things in general at home. I’m afraid of a “smash” with Dad’s affairs.
 
Tuesday 18th August 1896
Had letter from Mother: things get very much worse at home. Dread to think what the end will be. Must go down on Saturday.
 
Saturday 22nd August 1896
Went home this afternoon and found Mother very poorly again, Dad doing Cowfold Post work and Harry, Bert and Albert all hanging about at home.

 
Cowfold Village, 1881Cowfold Village, 1881, reproduced courtesy of West Sussex Past Pictures, Ref: PP/WSL/WA000347, Rep: West Sussex County Council Library Service; Image credit.
 

Saturday 9th September 1896
Had very bad news from poor Mother again today. Dad having a run on the drink again. Bills coming in and nothing to pay them. Things cannot last like this long. I myself would not be surprised to hear almost anything now. The worst part is the trouble and worry he is to Mother. Her life is made completely miserable. Dad is now doing Post work for Coppard, the last time I expect considering the disgraceful way he is going now.
 
Monday 14th September 1896
Little better news from home. Dad quiet again but of course very poorly and I expect, sour tempered. Poor Mother! Harry tries at Portsmouth to get in R.N. as stoker. Hope he will succeed. (He did not get [taken] on)
 
Sunday 13th December 1896
Dad very bad today, the effect of yesterday and Friday’s drinking. Never seen him so ill before from that cause but Mother says he has been worse. There’s no doubt drink tells on him very quickly now and it’s left its mark on him generally.
 
Monday 7th February 1897
Having yesterday received from Phil Taylor an offer of a start at the Palace[6] again, and after seriously thinking the matter over, wrote to him to thank him and decline the job, at least for a time. Much as I would like to go back, I don’t think I ought to leave home for Dad shows no signs of improving.
 
Week ending 13th February 1897
What a week this has been! Dad has been “on the run” again more or less since last Saturday. Don’t know things would have gone on if I had not been here. He came home about 7 this evening [Saturday] and went straight to bed. Seemed quite pleased to know he was safe, and I’m sure it was to Mother.
 
Monday 15th February 1897
Dad a lot better since Saturday. Only hope he will remain so.
 
Saturday 20th March 1897
Dad been on the drink again since Wednesday. He gets worse than ever.
 
Sunday 21st March 1897
Dad still drunk!

  • [1] I have no idea what the mention of the electric battery refers to.
  • [2] Presumably this means that all seven of Billy’s brothers and sisters were living at home at that time along with a couple of his Aunt’s children.
  • [3] From Hampton Court where Billy was working.
  • [4] One of Billy’s euphemisms for ‘drunk’.
  • [5] Harry was Billy’s 20 year old brother.
  • [6] Hampton Court Palace

 

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